SEATTLE - The journal of Aaron Ybarra, 26, was released Tuesday by the King County Prosecutor. Ybarra faces charges of murder, attempted murder and assault in the death of Paul Lee and wounding of two others in the June 5 shooting at Seattle Pacific University.
In the six page journal, Ybarra writes about his mental illness and troubles with OCD. He expresses frustration over his friends and family pressuring him to see a counselor.
"That caused me depression and problems," He wrote on May 27. "I gave therapy a shot, but the biggest reason that I went was for to get everyone off my back."
He goes on to write, "Nobody would listen. I knew something was going wrong and I knew therapy wouldn't do anything."
On June 2, Ybarra writes about his possible targets for the shooting.
"Washington State is the main target. I can't make it there with out any suspicion, my parents will keep wondering where I am."
He then writes about back up plans.
"I have Plan B's Central, Eastern and Seattle Pacific," He wrote on June 2. "Didn't thing about Eastern because I'm only prepared to be local."
Ybarra writes in the journal he chose SPU because he was less familiar with it.
"I can see that University of Washington and Seattle University represent Seattle more. I didn't want to have to attack my own city."
The day before the shooting at Seattle Pacific, on June 5th Ybarra writes, "This is it! I can't believe I'm finally doing this!"
As the journal entry ends Ybarra says the people behind the Virginia Tech and Columbine shootings are, "my idols."
He ends the final entry, "I just want people to die! and I'm gonna die with them."